THE FOURTH DIRECTIVE

A woman walked onto the set wearing a motocross helmet and goggles, chest protector, shin guards, and boots, all coated with silver spray paint. The dildo attached to the harness cinched around her waist jiggled with each step.

“Are you ready to do this?” Matt asked behind the camera. I nodded. “Do you know what your motivation is?”

“Fear that I got caught after snatching that woman’s purse by RoboCock. Fear what RoboCock might do to me. Fear that I might actually like RoboCock’s brand of erotic justice.”

“Good. Whenever you’re ready, action.”

An hour later, I gargled with mouthwash four times to try to get the latex taste out of my throat, $100 in ten-dollar bills peeked out of my pocket. I rehearsed an explanation to my wife why I smelled like baby food on the drive home.

(J. Bradley is the author of Dodging Traffic (Ampersand Books, 2009) and of The Serial Rapist Sitting Behind You is a Robot (Safety Third Enterprises, 2010).  He is the Interviews Editor of PANK Magazine and lives at iheartfailure.net.)